Available as a bonus CD to the first 3,000 buyers of the French version of Pets, this was truly a self-indulgent piece of work. This was supposed to be an excerpt from a future release to be entitled "Live Beef", a collection of live stuff from our American "K.A.O.S." Tour of the Spring of 1994. This "Excerpt" contained a thirty-minute version of "My Beef Mailbox", a song we played in order to give everyone in the band a chance to solo. Hell, it was long enough on an average night (ten minutes), but this version is several different nights' worth of "Beef" solos cross-faded repeatedly for her pleasure. Even I got into the act, slapping as fast as my little hands would allow. Really good luck finding this one, but if you do, you'll know what a band with Ahmet and Dweezil Zappa, Mike Keneally, Bryan Beller and Joe Travers was really capable of.

"Purple Guitar" was a showpiece tune, a nine-minute instrumental nightmare we used as a set closer. It was also my key audition piece, and until Dweezil released a re-mixed version (with practically no audible bass, I'm sad to say) on his solo effort Automatic this year, this limited-run CD was the only place you could hear it. Let's just say it was more fun to play live than to record.

For the way-too-long full story of the Music For Pets sessions, check out Act 18 of The Life Of Bryan, "Dissecting Pets".

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